Reminiscence
by OpheliaO
Summary: Zero reflects on the night he bit Yuuki for the first time.


Disclaimer: I don't own Vampire Knight or any characters pertaining to the manga/anime. This was written for fun :)

I struggled constantly with the insatiable thirst. The beast inside me fighting to be released.

For four years I lived with this pain, the headmaster was the only one who knew about the changes I was going through; there was no way that I could tell Yuuki but all things given time are revealed.

The gates of hell opened,

And I bit her.

I will never forget that night in the stair well.

Her comments about Level E vampires and how they were nothing but beasts in disguise; I felt disgusted by what was to be my own fate and I screamed at her.

"Zero" she spoke "We are just alike, you and I"

"No" I shouted vehemently "We are nothing alike, just leave me alone"

"Z….Zero" she whispered and I could detect the hurt in her melodic tone, I closed my eyes and began to silently scold myself.

The sound of her footsteps, she was leaving me. I didn't want Yuuki to leave knowing I had hurt her. I had to make amends.

I caught her in no time as she had no yet fully ascended the stairs and I grabbed her hand, the hand that had been bandaged concealing two tiny marks made by Aidou.

The bandage slipped off and the smell of her blood overwhelmed me.

I pulled her down to the base of the staircase.

"Z….Zero" Yuuki said, confused.

Her ivory neck was exposed, the bloodlust raged. I began to lick the side of her neck, preparing her for what was to come.

I was no longer Zero, I was now the beast I had fought so long to contain, the beast that pierced her neck roughly and began to drink the sweet life giving nectar deeply.

"Z…ZERO" she shouted now fighting against me

I could taste the panic, anger, betrayal, excitement, eroticism, it was all there in her blood.

Blood never lied, Yuuki could hide nothing; for all was revealed in this crimson liquor.

"Zero" she whispered, her body slacking in defeat

Her voice, weak, is what broke me. The only thing that broke me. I let her go and brought my hand to my face, trying to hide the monster I had become. I could feel the blood seep between my fingers. I had taken to much.

All Yuuki could do was stare at me, in shock, in disgust. I didn't speak, and I could say nothing. I was frozen.

"Z…Z….ero"

Her body swayed. I tried to will my body to move but it wouldn't.

"So was her blood as you imagined?"

I gasped, Kaname Kuran held yuuki gently in his arms, she was deathly pale.

"Was her blood so delicious that you felt the need to almost drain her?" he continued, driving the nails deeper into my already shattered heart

"You are nothing but a beast Zero Kiryuu; no, you are worse than a beast." he finished.

I watched as he walked towards the headmaster's office, Yuuki lying unconscious in his arms.

And I wept.

I had almost killed her, Kaname's words drilling a hole in my head. My heart was already destroyed.

I had almost killed her.

I finally found the will to move my body and when I did I ran to my room.

I lay in the darkness, the terrible act that I had just committed going over and over in my mind.

Rage consumed me and I yelled like a caged animal, pulling my hair, trying to force the mental images of Yuuki broken away.

I had to make it go away.

My eyes found my nightstand in the blanket of darkness and the object that rested upon it.

Bloody Rose.

My anti-vampire weapon shone in the darkness as if it were beckoning to me, promising me a sweet release from the pain, the misery; a way to forget about what I had just done to someone I care for deeply.

I slowly made my way across the room, did I really want to do this? And I knew the answer was yes.

I picked up the gun and sat on my bed, tears slowly began to fall down my cheek.

I didn't want to live with this pain anymore.

I cocked the gun and brought it to my temple.

My finger twitched on the trigger, hesitating, as if it had a will of its own and was trying to stop me.

And then my door burst open and there stood Yuuki, heaving as if she had ran a marathon.

She seen the gun that was pointed to my head and her eyes grew huge; she tackled me taking the gun from my hand I flipped her over on her back and now hovered above her, I grabbed her hand that held the gun and pointed it to my heart.

"Do it, kill me, I don't deserve to live after what I did to you" I spoke harshly staring into her big doe eyes.

"I will not Zero, I will not kill you" she replied, signs of hurt playing across her features " I wish you would have told me, I wish I could have been there all of those times you suffered alone" she continued,

Alone

"I want to help you Zero, I want to be there for you now, please let me save you from your fate, or, if I can't save you at least I can prolong it."

I smirked, did she honestly think that she could be my savior? Saint Yuuki.

No one could save me, and I told her so.

"Please Zero, can we just give it a chance, I don't want to lose you, you are like my brother I have already lost so much so please Zero, don't let me lose you"

I watched the tears form in her eyes and fall slowly down her rose tinted cheek.

At least she was no longer corpse pale.

I sighed in defeat, Yuuki could always get to me, and I always seemed to give her what she wanted.

"Fine Yuuki, if you think you can help me than I will let you, but if I get to dangerous, if I lose myself than promise me, that you will be the one to end it?"

She studied my face for a moment looking me straight in the eyes

"If it ever comes to it Zero I promise I will be the one to end your life" she whispered, pulling me down on top of her, embracing me and I returned that embrace.


End file.
